Sunday, January 5, 2020

5 Questions to Ask Yourself When You Start Losing Focus

5 Questions to Ask Yourself When You Start Losing Focus Article by Adam StettnerI was in my early 20s when my father passed away, and the loss made me realize that life is short. In the years that followed, I chased success while trying to figure out what success actually meant to me.By the time I reached my early 30s, I had moved from New York City to San Diego, and I had a wife and kids. I worked hard to create a new division at a publicly traded student loan company this division held assets worth $15 billion. When I left, I started another student loan company that made $450 1000000 in the first few months, and soon after that, I started a financial services company, Reliant Funding. I threw myself into work and found success.I was blindsided when my wife asked for a divorce. Everything stopped. My life was flipped upside down. My days were unfocused.The new business wasnt where I wanted it to be. When I reflected on all of my accomplishments, the y looked good on paper, but I knew I wasnt living up to my potential professionally or partally.How could I be the leader of a company and guide others if I wasnt guiding myself? How could I be the best father to my kids and the best partner if I wasnt caring for myself? I needed to confront my deficiencies and take control of my life.My divorce, though painful, was a catalyst to be better a better CEO, a better father, and ironically, a much happier person. The reality many CEOs dont talk about is how difficult it is to balance our personal lives while leading our companies. Its easy to avoid self-analysis and ignore those imbalances. Many dont stop to realize theyre standing in their own way. Ego, pride, and fear might all play a role.When I decided to work on being the best version of myself, I started asking specific questions to reevaluate my path. With a solid commitment to reevaluation, I gained a different focus. My business exploded, and my personal life vastly improved. I m now a healthier and infinitely mora fulfilled person. I only needed to stop and refocus.In order to keep myself in check, I still ask myself these questions1. Is My Energy Well Spent? Take a good look at yourself. Be completely honest about how you use your time. Ask yourself every day Am I spending my time wisely? If the answer is no, redirect your efforts. If something isnt moving you closer to your objective, dosomething that will.Look at the things you work on each day. Determine which items should be highest priority and which can be moved further down the list. You might have to stop and reevaluate your efforts several times per week, which is perfectly fine. Use those evaluations to protect your schedule from unnecessary distractions.Empower your employees to make calls independently. You dont need to know the details of every single project. Empowering your team will take you much further than you realize. If this leads to issues, you have the wrong team. 2. Do I Have a Ro utine to Guide Me?Identify the right bookends to balance your day. Sometimes it pays to be predictable. You cant control everything, but applying a routine to your mornings and evenings can help you handle the chaos in between.Put yourself first. You are often a forgotten item on a mile-long list. Whatever self-care looks like for you, just do it. I try to work out every morning and finish each day by reading in bed for at least 15 minutes. This is what works for me your routine might look dramatically different.Dont be afraid to change your routine if necessary. Finding what works for you may require some trial and error I know itdid for me. 3. Am I Ready?Its all about confidence. Be ready for the unexpected. Hold onto your inner confidence, because you need to believe that whatever situation arises, you can handle it. Confidence keeps you level-headed, calm, and focused.Stay positive. Dont just say it, do it. Remind yourself, catch yourself, and call yourself out. Turn into the ki nd of person whoalways looks for the silver lining. Notice negativity in others, too it will show you what you dont want to be.Accept the peaks and valleys. Instead of saying It is what it is, adopt an attitude of It is what I make it. Your personal approach to challenges and how you arrive at solutions is a defining leadership moment. 4. Do I Embrace the Bad?One of the ways to mitigate high levels of stress and anxiety is tochange your mindset. Embrace the bad.Dont fight it because you wont win. Growth is uncomfortable. Embrace this aspect of being an entrepreneur and CEO. Use stress to propel you. Some amount of anxiety can actually keep you sharp and focused.Take a negative situation and put a positive spin on it. You might find your tolerance for stress is much higher. There will be opportunity for you to see where the holes are holes you might have previously overlooked. 5. Do I Need to Check Myself?Recalibrate the way you think about yourself. Lose your ego. You shouldnt want to be right all the time. Discovering you were wrong about something almost always pushes you to learn and examine.Fall in love with finding out you are wrong from time to time. Learn from it and advance. Ego stands in the way of personal development. The worst part? You might not even realize it. Let it go.Adopt a beginners mindset. According to Zen teacher Shunryu Suzuki, In the beginners mind, there are many possibilities in the experts mind, there are few. Theres always something new to learn and youll often learn it when you least expect it. If you arent open-minded, youll miss amazing opportunities to improve your life in every way.Its been years since that difficult time, and a lot has changed in my life. If my personal life didnt undergo such a difficult phase, I wouldnt have stopped to consider where I was headed. It isnt just work ethic and intellect that determines a path to success. There has to be a true connection with yourself.A version of this article originally app eared on SUCCESS.com.Adam Stettner is the founder and CEO of Reliant Funding, which provides customized, short-term working capital to small and mid-sized businesses nationwide. With more than two decades of sales leadership and business development experience, he takes great pride in building a team of people who are empowered, educated, and love what they do.